The Magic & Mystery of Punk Rock

I became a lawyer as my only way out of poverty. My legal education was a gigantic process of running up debt to acquire mental capital, a huge gamble on the adequacy of my intelligence. I had invested three years of my life, and my wife's life, in becoming a lawyer. It was getting to be time to show my hand, and I was terrified. The image of Evel Knievel leaping the Grand Canyon persistently came to mind.

Fortunately The Ramones were there to give me a boost across the scary gulf between being a law graduate and being a practicing lawyer. My anxiety was omnipresent, but again and again I cut through it by plugging into the sound, rocking out in my apartment, in my van with my boom box, on the beach with my headphones, conquering the LA misery, cutting it down with the scythe of purest metal, healing the hurt with heartfelt vocals. With the innocence of Ramones music strengthening me, I faced up to the reams of legal formulas, melding my mind with the rules, performing the ritual that must be performed to don the advocate's robe. As the fateful three days of the California bar exam approached, Robin and I armored ourselves with magic. She bought two shirts that we each agreed to wear for all three days of the exam, with GABBA-GABBA-HEY! printed across the chest. I was so stoked when she pulled those out. Then, we tied three strips of black cotton cloth around our wrists, and agreed that we would cut one off at the end of each day of the exam. Since we were taking the exam in different cities, me in Pasadena, and she in Long Beach, these promises to ritualistically share the ordeal seemed especially important.

The songs I most listened to in those days were mostly drawn from Too Tough To Die, Pleasant Dreams, Leave Home, Rock N Roll High School, End of the Century, and Subterranean Jungle. Leave Home in particular we listened the hell out of, with Gimme Gimme Shock Treatment, Oh Oh I Love Her So, Pinhead, and California Sun being among the top picks. One day I heard She's The One on the radio and just about died. It ruled number one in my heart as favorite Ramones song for about two years. You could charm me like a cobra just by playing that song. Robin loved Needles and Pins, and I was crazy about I Want You Around, especially remembering Riff Randall in the movie, looking all dreamy in red lingerie while Joey sang her the song right there in her bedroom. I loved the saccharine sweet melody of Danny Says, and kept trying to figure out what the hell was going on at 53rd & Third. My kids and Tara, my wife, loved Rock N Roll High School, and we would all go wild over the scene where Joey and the boys ride up the street in an orange Cadillac convertible, to the irresistible beat of I Just Wanna Have Somethin' To Do. But of course even that is topped by the climactic scene where the nerd and geek fall in love as the entire cheerleader squad comes marching down the stairs backed by live Ramones playing Do You Wanna Dance? Yes, yes, that's the answer. We want to DANCE!


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